Though by myself today, I was not alone. With me were Gix, and our new friend Franca, who flew us through sea town and by bays on a seaside road in the cold.
Today I expected would be just like the others these past several weeks, months - a period of comfortable solitude, often by myself, but not alone/ lonely.
A balanced life requires that we be ok with being by (with) our self and also being with others. Crucial to this is the understanding that "being with an other" shouldn't be seen in binary opposition to "being alone" but rather as one form of "being with others" and that the concept of alone is not helpful, since we are always at a minimum by (with) our self..
But today the wind forced itself, cold and sad into my heart, the gulls laughed at my optimistic attempts to fly free, and the salt air stung an internal wound that apparently hasn't yet healed.
I pedaled harder.
Kept pedaling up the tough hills, honoring the challenges that lead to a sublime flight on the other side....
NB:
I notice that I have used the word "solitude" almost as if it is neutral. Like many English words that originate in French, it has less of a visceral impact than the Old English (German) counterparts. [Eg. compare viscera (F) and gut (OE)]
A man can be himself only so long as he is alone; ... if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom; for it is only when he is alone that he is really free.
Schopenhauer, "The World as Will and Idea," 1818
http://www.etymonline.com/index.php?allowed_in_frame=0&search=visceral&searchmode=none
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